Saturday, July 23, 2005
tots
i'm finally going to post one post on my tots. was thinking back at the small speech a taxi driver uncle gave me while i was on my way to tj on the day i had to arrive at sch super early to get ready for nationals.
he gave me a speech on why i shld not have boyfriends at such a age. i found it rather amusing. but i was amazed at his wide range of knowledge. i think being a taxi driver has allowed him to see alot. i think he was just being perky early in the morning while i was feeling really dead. so i started talking rubbish. it was really funny back then. but come to think of it now. mayb what he said is true.
mayb it is true. i mean, if that is what all the adults are telling us. it has to be true somehow rite? not all, but most. i think that most of the time, its the
raging hormones at work. it doesnt allow me to think rationally nor does it allow me to seperate my emotions from my mind.
[i am but rational] confusing times like this forces me to do tings that would enable me to focus my mind on someting else, like doing more studying. when my mind is focused on the endless trigo, statistics and integration questions, i dont waste time and energy thinking about things that dont really matter. its times like this that i wonder whether my friends are really my friends. came to a conclusion that when i think and wonder more, i would confuse myself further. thats why i shut down myself and never bothered to think much into stuff. mayb thats why i'm really blur nowadays. used to be more alert and sharp about back stabbing people and hypocrites, but now i'm not so sure. maybe thats why my
frail heart has been smashed into pieces by trusting the wrong person time after time. i've lost so much faith that i dont know if i can trust them. mayb my issues are just
SMALL time. but hey, its my own issues and u dont have the right to comment on them unless i ask u to. its
MY own business, not yours, u bitch.
the writer blogged at 7:05:00 PM
